Lauren Barnholdt ([info]laurenbarnholdt) wrote,
@ 2009-06-24 10:57:00
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BAD NEWS: To Blog Or Not To Blog?
So there’s been a lot of discussion lately about bad news and why writers don’t talk about it on their blogs. I think there was some drama involved, but I’m not totally sure, and besides, that’s not important and so I’m not going to get into it. (Which is weird, because usually I am a big fan of drama, for serious.)

Anyway, I started thinking about it, about why writers don’t blog about their bad news, and why you only hear the good stuff. I mean, shouldn’t the bad news and disappointments be important too? Shouldn’t we all start blogging about it, so that everyone can have hope and realize that WE’VE ALL BEEN THERE?

And here is what I came up with:

1. You have to censor yourself on your blog. At least a little. The same way I wouldn’t blog about the details of my brother’s drug problem (I don’t have a brother, and if I did, I wouldn’t talk about his drug problem, see?), I’m not going to come out and give every single detail about the bad times I’m having with publishing.

It’s just.. I don’t know, personal. And let’s face it – getting a book cancelled or having a book bomb sales-wise, or getting rejected all over the place or any of the five million other bad things that can happen in publishing is not really that fun to blog about. I like to wallow by myself.


2. You have to stay professional. Let’s say, for example, that my book is getting rejected by every house all over New York and I’m freaking out and my agent is all, “Oh, don’t worry, we still have two houses left, keep the faith and even though that last editor was wondering if this book is even in English, we will find a home for it yet!” Probably the last thing I want to do is keep the faith. Probably I want to throw myself off a balcony because HELLO THAT BOOK IS THE BEST THING I EVER WROTE, and if it doesn’t sell I will DIE.

Am I going to blog about that? Um, no. Because what if one of the editors at the two houses that are left googles me and sees that I’ve just written, “MY LIFE IS OVER, I WOULD SELL THAT BOOK FOR FIVE DOLLARS RIGHT ABOUT NOW.”

Maybe they will get nervous that I am crazy.

Maybe they will think, “Hmm, why didn’t anyone else want this book, I might have to think about this” and then set it to the side and move on to eating their lunch.

Maybe they will think, “Five dollars!! What a bargain!” and whip up a P&L that shows how five dollars really does make complete and total sense.
Maybe they will think, “Hmm, if we have any bumps in the road, maybe Lauren will blog all about how crazy I am since she does not have a censor, so I will have to think about this after I have a cupcake.”

Maybe none of those things would happen. But maybe they would.

(Also, I do not have to worry about ever blogging anything like that anyway, because I am very well-adjusted and obviously not dramatic enough to even think those things, la la la.)


3. Let’s face it. Good news is sometimes hard to hear. Someone gets a huge book deal. Someone sells their movie rights. Someone hits the bestseller list, or they get a three-book deal when you only got two books or someone is a lead title or someone has better hair than you. (Obviously the hair thing is a joke. But I’m looking at you, Jennifer Lynn Barnes.)

Anyway.

It can be hard to deal with, the jealousy and the wondering about when that thing is going to happen to YOU. But the thing is? You have to realize that EVERY SINGLE ONE of those people had hard times. They had struggles. And they will have them again. Because that is the fun, wonderful, crazy thing about publishing! It is a marathon, not a sprint, and in the end, the race is only with yourself. (That part about the race only being with yourself is from that song, WEAR SUNSCREEN, you know, the graduation advice thing that was going around years ago? It just flowed out of me, as I was writing that. Also, I meant it to be a cheesy kind of joke, but then I realized that it’s true – the race IS only with yourself! Hmm, I think I will download that song onto my iPod.)

When someone is putting up very good news and I get a little jealous, I try to remember these things:

A.) They went through hard times. Even though they maybe didn’t blog about them, they did. If they are a friend of mine, usually I know the hard times they went through. If they’re not, I just know, because that is the way it works. So then I think about how cool it is, that they overcame a bunch of obstacles and are now getting great news. Good for them for keeping at it. Everyone loves an underdog story, and we are ALL underdogs.

B.) Writing and publishing are not the same thing. Jenny Crusie talks about this a lot, and I think it’s so smart. You have to keep writing and publishing separate, because once you start confusing the two, you’re going to be all sorts of messed up. THE WRITING is what you can control. The publishing stuff is, to a large extent, out of your control. So focus on the writing. Always.

C.) It’s important to be happy with where you are. At first, you want to finish a book. Then you want an agent. Then you want to sell a book. Then you want to sell another book. Then you want more money. Then you want more sales. Then you want a book tour and a … It just keeps going on and on and on. Which is awesome, because there are always new goals to achieve. But sometimes it’s important to take stock of your accomplishments and be happy in the moment. If my five-years-ago self could see me know? OMG, she would be ECSTATIC. And you know what? My right-now self should be too.


4. I have sometimes felt a little guilty posting things about new sales or new covers when I know some of my friends might be struggling.

But the awesome, amazing thing? Is that more often than not, those writers who were struggling? They soon have good news of their own. Maybe at a time when I’m struggling. And it makes me think, “Omg, that is so cool, because they were just struggling and now I’m struggling so maybe soon I won’t be struggling anymore!” (Well, most of the time. The other part of the time I go back and read my list about how not to be jealous.)

I love that we can all be happy for each other when we get good news. I’m constantly astounded by the way writers congratulate each other, celebrate each other, and encourage each other to keep at it. Writers are amazing like that – especially YA writers – and I am so lucky to be in a position where I’ve gotten to know so many wonderful people.

And when I’m having a bad day, I know, I know, something good will happen again soon. You have to have faith. I mean, let’s face it – if we didn’t have faith, would we even be writing in the first place? We’re all obviously completely and totally nuts.

Don’t you just love publishing? ☺

More later,
xx


(26 comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]rose_thomason
2009-06-24 03:08 pm UTC (link)
Great post, Lauren! Personally, I always love hearing good news from other writers. I love hearing about the industry and the steps it took to get there and how each person accomplished that. I look up to all those writers who are one step (or many) ahead of me and think, "someday, that could be me." So I keep that hope and live vicariously through the excitement and great news of other writers :)
And yes, writers are so awesome and always congratulate each other and recognize accomplishments. It's great to have such a huge support system of writers who have all been there and understand better than anyone else the highs and lows.

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 03:10 pm UTC (link)
Yes! I like the whole, "Someday that could be me" school of thought.

You have to start blogging more, we miss you!

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[info]rose_thomason
2009-06-25 08:39 pm UTC (link)
Aww, thanks! I've been on facebook and twitter more lately and slowly working back to the blogging more, now that I have stuff to write about :)

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[info]megancrane
2009-06-24 03:20 pm UTC (link)
This is a great post.

I think that people forget that these are not our personal blogs, if we're writers--these are business blogs. And it's just not good business to complain about how bad business is, I don't think. It's all about perception, and even if you can't control the publishing business (and we certainly can't!) you can control how your blog is perceived to some extent. Or anyway, that's how I think about it.

Thanks for writing this!

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 03:44 pm UTC (link)
Yes, exactly! I think people do forget that these aren't personal blogs, they're business blogs. And while we do sometimes blog about things other than writing/business, there is a line there..

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[info]edithspage
2009-06-24 03:40 pm UTC (link)
Awesome post, Lauren! You rawk.

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 03:44 pm UTC (link)
Haha! Thanks!

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[info]sachaw
2009-06-24 03:46 pm UTC (link)
OMG - I love that sunscreen song. And yes, I am very jealous when you post good news AND very, very happy too! We're allowed to be both, right? :o)

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 03:48 pm UTC (link)
Definitely allowed to be both :) I know I am when I read someone else's..

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[info]kimberleylittle
2009-06-24 03:50 pm UTC (link)
You stole my post!!! Kidding!

Hey, Lauren, it's all the stuff I've been thinking about since *the drama* and you said it all perfectly. And now I don't have to. ;-D

Sometimes I'm painfully, (so painfully that it makes me self-conscious), aware of all the other people besides writers who are reading my blog. Can't be too careful. Other writers have gotten bit in the derriere on things they've posted.

I suspect that when a lot of writers first got on LJ, they saw it more as a writer support group and almost like a personal diary kind of thing, ie. let it all hang out, the angst, the frustration, the tears, the journey, but once you start having some success, all of a sudden what you're writing becomes much more *public.*

You are a wise woman, thank you again.


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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 03:54 pm UTC (link)
That's all so true, and you make such a great point -- even though our blogs are now "business" blogs, sometimes people do start their blog before their published, letting it all hang out. It's hard to make that mental switch over to it being a different, more censored kind of blog...

And sorry for hijacking your post, ha!

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[info]sheela_chari
2009-06-25 04:37 am UTC (link)
I have to admit, I'm finding the transition from the personal to the business kind of challenging. I don't think I was ever letting it "all hang out" but definitely, I felt like I could share my ups and downs with other writer friends who were going through the same thing (finishing that first novel, getting an agent, a book deal,etc).

Now post book-deal, I feel like I have to find my voice all over again. I think of Carrie Jones' post the other day - Why I Write. I think it is actually a good question to ask yourself. Also, Why I Blog, and to find the answer to that in a way that really represents you.

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-25 01:33 pm UTC (link)
Yes, I think you're right -- that when you start blogging before you sell a book, there's a certain candidness (even if you're not blogging about EVERYTHING) that you can afford. I never had a blog before I sold a book, but I can imagine it's a weird transition.

On the same lines, it kind of bleeds over into everything after you sell -- you're worried about writing a book that will keep your brand, you're worried because you know your editor doesn't like zomble books, so maybe you should write something else, you know that book about X didn't do so well, so maybe an X book isn't a good idea..

It really can drive you crazy! So frustrating writing and promotion and publishing and public persona, all these things that are supposed to somehow work together..

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[info]mandywriter
2009-06-24 04:03 pm UTC (link)
Awesome post. Another thought is that if one feels the need to write the complaining posts, you can write htem for yourself and lock them for only your eyes.

My blog was once a big mixture of being hopeful and being down--sharing rejection--and I liked that I showed both sides.

But now that I have a contract (or two) I am forced to be much more careful about what I say. Things I say can reflect upon my publisher or agent. My editor, agent, readers, will all see it. It's a new ball game once you have the contract.

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[info]karenkincy
2009-06-24 07:40 pm UTC (link)
I wish I'd known this years ago... so much angst would have been saved! I still tend to forget, from time to time.

> Maybe they will think, “Five dollars!! What a bargain!” and whip up a P&L that shows how five dollars really does make complete and total sense.

:D

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 07:49 pm UTC (link)
Ha! We all tend to forget things from time to time..

Especially in publishing, because even though it's a business, it's our writing and our dreams that we're putting out there, which is totally emotional..

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[info]bostonerin
2009-06-24 08:41 pm UTC (link)
Wise words from a wise woman.

Thanks for posting this.

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[info]tinaya
2009-06-24 09:12 pm UTC (link)
My motto is-- WWMCD (What would Meg Cabot do?).

Would she blog about that? Nope? Me neither. :)

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-24 09:26 pm UTC (link)
LOL!!

OMG, I love this!!

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[info]tsd_writer
2009-06-25 03:24 am UTC (link)
That was a really great post!

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-25 03:25 am UTC (link)
Thank you!!

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[info]acoppedge
2009-06-25 09:14 am UTC (link)
Awesome post, and spot-on. I have a personal, locked-down lj I've had for much longer than I have had my writing one and I let the crazy hang out there, you betcha.

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-25 01:34 pm UTC (link)
I really like the idea of the locked-down ljwith all all the crazy hanging out! (Although now I'm totally personifying crazy, like it's this creature that's locked up in your private lj)

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[info]acoppedge
2009-06-25 04:01 pm UTC (link)
Hahaha

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[info]iliketea
2009-06-27 02:04 pm UTC (link)
Such a great post. :D

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[info]laurenbarnholdt
2009-06-28 12:42 am UTC (link)
Thank you :)

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